A few weekends ago, I attended my wife’s girlfriend’s wedding. It was a nice intimate gathering and I was very happy for her. However, after a heart warming slideshow, a delicious filet mignon dinner, and some yummy wedding cake, I got an unexpected surprise. I came face to face with my mid life crisis moment.
The official program ended and they opened the floor for dancing. The bride grabbed some of her girlfriends, let loose, and ripped up the dance floor. Some of her younger cousins with their significant others jumped into the fray. I looked over to my wife and asked if she wanted in. She was still battle weary from her over 20 hour labor, she politely declined. I wasn’t thinking clearly as our baby would be without supervision. As I sat there watching the dance floor buzzing with energy. I felt life was passing me by. Years earlier, my friends and I would be the ones cutting up the rug. Now we were two weary parents with a ball and chain in tow who couldn’t even get to the dance floor even if we wanted to. How did I pull myself from the brink?
I took a long breath, calmed my mind, and slowly pushed the negative anxiety out of my mind.
I looked on the bright side and enjoyed watching the people on the dance floor having such an amazing time. I looked at the blushing bride and wished her a happy new life and recalled my wedding day.
Recognize the Problem
I quickly sifted through my mind and figured the root of the anxiety was my loss of a choice. It’s not like I hit the clubs on the weekends, but if I wanted to, I felt I could no longer choose that option. It was a combination of losing some freedom and getting old.
Cut the Drama and Embrace the New
My mind was working overtime. “18 years with the new baby. Kiss your old life good bye. You’re no spring chicken because you’re an old fogey!” I forced these thoughts out of my mind and glanced at my wife and our new bundle of joy. This is not a prison sentence. It is a new phase of life. You’re a daddy, enjoy it!
Having a baby, surviving on 4 hours of broken sleep, combined with endless hours of diaper duties shook me to the core. I then realized what I was going through was natural. I now embrace the challenge of taking care of my expanding family while also taking this as a huge opportunity to improve myself. My family depends on it. Finally, if I really wanted to go dancing, can’t I just hire a babysitter?